One of the greatest movies of the year for me is CLICK! In this movie Adam Sander, the actor, was given this special remote control that whatever he dislikes or unpleasantness, he could simply click fast forward. To make matter worse, this remote control has the ability of self-programming, that is, after a while, it will know what are your dislikes, and will automatically fast forward it for you. Of course, he is fast forwarding his life so fast, he misses the opportunity to see his children grows, the love of his wife and his family members. The only success is his career, which gives him the pride, ego, status, and lifestyle. And when the time comes for him to cross over, the angel of death told him “You are fast forwarding your life so fast, I am just waiting for you to arrive.” Are you clicking your life away?

This is Peter Ng. Welcome to my motivational series – Awakening the Power within You – Click: Fast-forwarding Our Lives.

What does it mean by fast-forwarding my life? And do we have that remote control? Let me answer the last question first, the remote control that is given to us is our mind. We program it to like or dislike, we program it to avoid whatever unpleasantness and we program it to do what we like. After a while, the mind will automatically program itself for you to avoid what you dislike and to do what you desire (unconsciously).

Now, how we fast-forward our lives? We fast-forward our lives when we start to –

• Do things that precedence our loved ones
• Avoid unpleasant things or relationships in our life (living in denial)
• Our selfish ambitious at whatever expenses
• Being presence but not being there
• Blame others for our failures and unhappiness
• Have an attitude of me, myself and I
• Low empathy or insensitive to others’ needs

If you never experience sorrow, how can you appreciate true joy? If you never experience the ‘hard’ times, how can you enjoy the good? If you avoid those experiences of seeing your children grow up, how can you experience the joy and true parenthood? When we fast-forward, we take things – no, we take life – for granted!

Along the way (in life), we will have knocks and falls, bruises, and stripes, but that is to tell us that we are living a life. That’s very true.

But do people really fast-forwarding their lives, Peter? Here are a few examples which I encountered during my life coaching sessions –

• Paul goes to the pub every night after work, and told his wife he needs to entertain his clients, which in actual fact he hates going home in the evening because his children was too noisy and giving him the headaches.
• Mary told her hubby that she loves him but no time for him as she is running a business. And worst, she didn’t even know that her hubby was suffering from cancer till the final stage.
• Davi only wanted to pursue her dreams, her studies, her life, hers hers hers … realize that it’s always hers – and when you talked to her, every conversation and subjects will always eventually ends up just talking about her. She is so self-centered that she becomes quite ignorance of what’s going on around her. And worst, in pursuance of her dreams and her life, she missed many great opportunities to progress herself.
• Tom only concentrates on his career progressions and promotions, and his life surrounds only on his career. He lost the opportunity to see his children growing up. The next thing he knew they are already young adults and he just couldn’t hold any conversation with them as he don’t even know them, or may I said, they don’t know him, except a bread-winner.
• Patrick focus on wanting to climb to the top, he lost his sense of identity, cannot make decisions as he is always going with the flow of his bosses, and trying to be the person whoever his bosses wanted him to be. No one has respect for him.
• Phyllis spends so much time searching her self-identity and her values; and whenever things goes wrong in her life, be it her studies or career or love-life, she blames the whole world. She refuses to do any form of self-reflection to improve her image, communication skills, and attitude. She thinks she is always right, and everyone is always wrong!